Do you ever have those moments when you are in deep prayer and feel as though you are literally on your knees, in the Most Holy Place, surrounded by the Lord's visible presence?
I have those moments every now and then, and I wish they were a lot more frequent. One day they will be, and they will be real and forever and amazing.
However, today as I set absorbed in the presence of God, crying out to Him for some direction, clarity, understanding, growth, knowledge and wisdom, I found myself asking in a different manner than before.
I asked with a heart of expectancy. I asked with a new boldness. I asked with a faith that said, "I believe in Your promptness, power, and love for me."
Though there has been waiting, and it might even continue, I found myself wide-eyed, with my heart at attention, looking, listening, expecting.
Expecting to see Him, to hear Him, and to be radically moved by Him.
And I was. And I found. And I heard. And I felt Him. I felt Him breath on me as He spoke the words I have longed to hear.
So what now, now I know. Now I shape my life around His truth, His answers, His provision, direction, and desire.
Now, now I have tasted and seen.
Now, I want more! More of Him. More wide-eyed moments. More radically moved moments that shake me to the core. I want more of these God ordained moments where He shows up and says, "
Here. Here I am. Come to Me over and over with that faith. That faith that shows me its complete. I want more of that longing, that desperation, that comes from a heart that knows where the only living water exists."
It's not about pride in "who" I am. It's not about, "Hey look at my gift." Its about experiencing Christ in such a way, your only state of being is humble, grateful, and overflowing with amazement of His presence.
It's about a pouring out of self, so that the pouring in, is of Him.
Isn't that our true desire? To pour Christ into others?
Sometimes we need a perspective change. One that says, Look to Him, rather than look at "Me."
I think once that revelation and transformation takes place, we will then find ourselves being used by the Lord in ways only He can. For then, and only then, will we see a pouring in of Him that changes lives.
For Your honor and glory, Lord.
