Did you know?

"There is salvation in no one else! There is no other name in all of heaven for people to call on to save them." Acts 4:12


May I just say how LOVED you are by the Lord.

May I just say how ADORED you are by the Lord.

May I just say how FORGIVEN you are because of the Lord.

May I just say how much MERCY you are given daily by the Lord.

May I just say how much your FRIENDSHIP means to the Lord

May I just say how much you are DESIRED by the Lord.

May I encourage you today to BELIEVE in the Lord?

May I urge you today to BELIEVE in His amazing promises?

May I ask you to READ those promises and love letters for yourself?

May I just say how MIGHTY our Lord is and that there is no other name in all of heaven or earth as GREAT has His.

There is no other being in all of this world that can do for you what Christ did. There is no other being in all of this world that will give you all that Christ has given you and will give you. Oh, that we would grow to understand the greatness of Christ. That we would cling to every word He has spoken, and that we would believe with every ounce of us all that He has promised us.

He is more than what our minds can comprehend. He is more precious, valuable, and needed than we could ever begin to understand. He is more HOLY than we can even grasp.

He is just so BIG, so ABLE, and so WILLING to do more for us than what we could ever dare to ask, hope for, or even think.

Can I ask you to make Him your EVERYTHING?

Jesus my mind is unable to even put into words how magnificent You are. Thank You, thank You for being that BIG, that Mighty, that Holy, that Perfect, and for being my Everlasting Father, Savior, Redeemer, Counselor, and Prince of Peace. Amen

Minimizing "Me" and Magnifying Him

"And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all the while giving thanks through him to God the Father." Colossians 3:17

Yes, yes, yes we need to be able to talk about what we are going through, our celebrations, our struggles, our sorrows...BUT!

When those conversations are constantly centered on SELF and not on God, I think we begin to exalt our SELF, focus more on our SELF and take the spot light off of Christ and place it on our SELF.

We are attention-needing people and we make it known. Think about all the things that have been created so we can feed the attention self needs- Blogging, Facebook, twitter, email, TV, plastic surgery, products to look younger, how to lose weight, our clothes, bigger houses, cars, our jobs etc.

 Please understand I am not saying these things are wrong.  I am saying if they consume you, and you spend more time focusing on them then you do on Christ...well yes I believe it is wrong!

The more I study the word of God, the more I realize how little Christ focused on His actual "self." Every word Christ spoke, every action, every miracle, even His every thought was placed on His Father.

"Don't you believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me? The words I say are not my own, but my Father who lives in me does his work through me. Just believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me. Or at least believe because of what you have seen me do." John 14:10-11

Jesus never spent His time talking about "self" instead He talked about what was most important, our faith in Him. Brethren, if anyone should talk about themselves it is definitely the Creator.

Here is what I am learning. Maybe if we spent more time actually talking about Jesus and His word and less about ourselves, maybe, just maybe more lives would be impacted for Christ.

I remember having the conversation with Brother Tilley about starting a blog for my writing, the thought kept running through my head, "As long as it does not become about me."

I have been down that road with Facebook. It started out specifically for our college Sunday School class and ended up being about me. God shut that down! The conviction was strong and He was relentless, thus ending it in a way I never expected. But I obeyed and am glad I did, otherwise I would probably still be focusing on the "me."

Today it seems as though everything is starting to involve more and more of the "me" in us, and less and less about the Lord.

We have to be willing to give up things that take the place of the Lord; whether it be blogging, email, Facebook, twitter, where we place our attention, or even adjusting our speech so our conversations don't revolve around ourselves.

I just wonder how we can live out Colossians 3:1-2; 17 if we are always talking about ourselves and throwing God in there every now and then. vs 1-2, "Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits at God's right hand in the place of honor and power. Let heaven fill your thoughts. (We can't do that if we are always thinking about ourselves) Do not think only about things down here on earth."

Whether we accept it or not, when we spend more time talking about ourselves and placing the attention on ourselves through our actions and speech, we are minimizing the Lord and magnifying the "ME"

Seriously, I am trying to figure out why we don't talk about Jesus more and ourselves less. I mean if you really  think about it, our lives are not at all as cool or as exciting as Christ's life!

Hearing and talking about Jesus never gets old and something good ALWAYS comes from His name!

Talking about "you" well....it just gets old and people don't get to know Jesus when we talk about our SELF!

So whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all while giving thanks through Him to God the Father.

A good way to evaluate if you are self- focused is what you spend a lot of time doing and what you post, write, email, blog, your actions and how your conversations are with others.

Jesus You should be the topic of conversation 24/7! You should be what we think about 24/7. Hasten the day Lord when you return and it is all about You for eternity. Amen

What's your choice?

"Blessed are you, O Lord; teach me your principals." Psalm 119:12

I have come to understand the difference between circumstances I cannot control and circumstances I can control.

A big circumstance Garret nor I have been able to control is the health of our two year old, Dax. 

Though the last year has dealt us many difficult circumstances, we by the Grace of God have had the opportunity to deal with these circumstances in a positive or negative manner. God has given us that freedom. He allows us to determine what our attitude will be as each new trial approaches.

As we face another difficult phone call from the doctor regarding Dax's test results, we know, though we cannot control it, God can! 

God controls all things; including Dax's sickness and healing.

Just this weekend Garrett looked at me and said,"Does this not upset or bother you (the test results)?"

My reply, "No not really, it's not cancer and it's way better than Hell!"

Garrett's response laughter! 

I cannot control life, sickness, or death. But I CAN choose to control how I handle each. 

And I plan on handling them just as Jesus did, (well at least the best I can) with joy, trust, faith, and the confidence in knowing that my God is able and in control. 

He works all things out for the good of those who love Him, and this is one sister that loves Him and claims that promise over this uncontrolled circumstance! 

What circumstance do you find yourself in today? 

Jesus I have not always chose to handle difficult circumstances with grace and dignity, but today I CHOOSE to do so! Amen

Lead us Lord, we are following You!

"Blessed are you, O Lord; teach me your principals." Psalm 119:12

Jesus today we begin the search for our new church home. Keep us from comparing, open our hearts and our eyes to see where You need and want us to serve. Lord we want to be where You are and where Your word is spoken. Reveal Yourself to us today. Just as the disciples left everything and followed You, we too have left the comforts of our church home to follow You. We are excited for this new journey with You, and with all those we meet along the way. Use us Lord for Your glory alone. Amen

A new birthday celebration!

31 years ago the Lord placed me in the arms of a woman and a man for whom He entrusted my life and care into. 

He picked them out specifically for me-knowing they would be the perfect earthly parents one of His own children could have until they (I) return to Him again. 

He knew upon my arrival the importance He would need to be in their lives individually, together, and as parents once again for the third time.

Oh how important He was, is and will always be. 

Not only did the Lord place me into the arms of this man and woman 31 years ago, but He placed me in the arms of two sets of grandparents who left an imprint of the meaning of for better or worse, till death do us part, as they both celebrated 50 years of marriage!

Rarity! 

Today I am blessed to have a mom and dad who love the Lord, love one another, and love me. 

Today I do not celebrate me, I celebrate them! It is because of them I have made it 31 years. It is because of them that in these 31 years, I have seen the reflection of the one for whom I am madly in love with today-Jesus. 

And it is all because this man, my daddy, and this woman, my mama-made Jesus, Lord of their lives, their marriage, and our home. 

So today I celebrate not me, but them! Today I celebrate Christ and the love relationship we have. 

Today I celebrate because the Lord has picked Garrett and I out specifically for Avery and Dax. It is now our turn to instill, reflect, and build our home around Christ Jesus. 

Mom and Dad I could not be more honored to have been placed in your arms 31 years ago. Today I celebrate you and the love you have for the Lord. 

Daddy, one time you told me you and mama's only job was to ensure your girls went to heaven, well you have done that very job and you have done it well!

Today I want to give you both the gift of vowing to do the same thing with my boys! 

Thank You! Today I am not celebrating turning 31, I am celebrating 19 years of being a child of God-because of you two! 

Kisses sweet things, 

Kristi

how deep is it?

"Blessed are you, O Lord; teach me your principals." Psalm 119:12

To be able to look at the face of one less fortunate and see Jesus-powerful

To be able to look at the face of a friend who has hurt you and see the blood of Jesus-freedom

To be able to look at the face of an addict and see Jesus through the mess-breath taking

To be able to look at the face of a murderer and see Jesus' scarred hands-mercy

To be able to look at the face of the one who rejects Jesus and see His love for them-grace

To be able to look at the face of the one living in sin and see Christ on the cross-hope

To be able to look at the reflection starring back at you and see the eyes of Jesus-Life changing

How deep does your vision go?

Jesus align my vision with Yours. Mine has a tendency to be shallow making me miss the greatness of Your love and mercy. Amen

How do you spend your 24 hours?

"Blessed are you, O Lord; teach mr your principals." Psalm 119:12

At the end of the day when the busyness of life settles down, what do I have to show for with time given to me within the 24 hour period?

Did I use part of that time with the Lord?

Did I use another portion serving others?

Did I use a bit of that time investing in the life of my boys-learning more about them, their likes and dislikes?

From time to time did I stop to just say, "Thank You Jesus."

Did I use some time to tell some about Jesus or encourage them through His word?

Did I spend time praying for those who are hurting, sick, or just in need of prayer?

Or have I have gone a million miles an hour being so caught up in things that don't really matter that much but please me or please someone other than God?

What do I do with the time I am given?

What have I done with it for the past 31 years that I need to do better these next however many years I have left?

Time is fleeting and we never get it back nor do we get back the days we missed being in his word, sharing His word, loving, encouraging and teaching our children the word.

We beg for more time but we don't even make use of the time we are given!

Jesus don't let me waste another day filling it with junk or busyness. Help me make the most of each day and the time I have left. May each day be spent investing in You and in others. Keep me from being wasteful. Thank You for the time You are going to give me and forgive me for the time I wasted on myself. Amen

What makes you blessed?

"Blessed are you, O Lord; teach me your principals." Psalm 119:12

What does the word blessed mean to you? According to God's word it means happy or wonderful, praiseworthy; bringing pleasure or divine power.

All of which describe the Lord just as the Author expressed in this passage.

Happy are You, O Lord. Wonderful are You, O Lord.
Praiseworthy are You, O Lord. You bring pleasure through Your divine power, O Lord.

Blessed indeed is He!

The word blessed means way more to me today than yesterday.

Today the only thing that makes me blessed is Christ in me. His mercy, His grace, His forgiveness. That is why I am blessed.

It is not the materialistic things or the pleasures here on earth-it His sacrifice and love alone that allows me to even use the word blessed.

Jesus You are the reason I am blessed. What You did for me truly blesses me. I am forever, literally forever thankful because of Your amazing love. Amen

What role does He play in your life?

"Blessed are you, O Lord; teach me your principals." Psalm 119:12

What role does Jesus play in your life and in mine?

Is He our insurance agent-who is used only to keep us safe from the fire?

Is He our personal agent-used only to serve the desires and needs of our self?

Is He our on call doctor-used only when serious illness strikes?

Is He our secret weapon for our political campaign-used only to make ourselves look good and gain the votes of others.

Is He mentioned in conversation-only so we can sound like a Christian-yet not walk the walk?

Do we enter His throne room-only when a crisis strikes?

Is He the president of red-cross-used only when a need arises?

Is He Our friend-only when we need something or need some company? 

OR 

Is He our Savior, Redeemer, lover, and friend? Is He our source of life, our daily bread? Is He the One and Only thing that matters more to us than our families, our selves, our careers, our breath? 

What is Jesus' role in your life?

Jesus You are the very reason we exist. You are more than what we make of You. You are the Creator and the Bread of Life. You are the Inventor of healing, of hope, help, and You are far more important than to be used just so we can look or sound good from a humans perspective. Forgive us for shrinking Your holiness down in order to please the self in us. Reveal just how Holy, powerful, mighty, and amazing You really are. Amen

What do you think about?

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you."

I am a thinker, I am constantly thinking about something. At times my thoughts can become so consuming they drive me CRAZY! 

I must say it can get so bad at times that I begin thinking about what I am thinking about and I begin analyzing every thought. How crazy is that?

I do this especially when it comes to studying the word of God. 

If you don't now this about me-I LOVE studying God's word! If I could, I would be a forever lifelong student of God's word. I mean like the type of student that does nothing but study His word ALL day everyday. I love the deep theological stuff!!! 

I must add that was one of my favorite things about Brother Collins was how deep he would get in God's word. I see that in his grandson Ryan when I hear him preach! 

I will confess reading and studying the word is probably my hobby! 

But God does not want me to just sit isolated forever studying His word. He wants me to go out and share that word and live out that word. 

And boy do I love TALKING about Jesus-I think it drives my family crazy but I think they secretly like to do it too. 

So how do I overcome analyzing every thought when study? Well for a while, God love Him, I would call the MOST amazing mentor- Brother Tilley and we would chat, email, or set up meetings just to talk about those thoughts of Gods word that I was thinking about. 

Those are great times because He knows Him some Jesus, and He just so happens to be madly in love with Jesus and His word.

Do you know that it has taken me awhile to learn that it is okay to be consumed with thoughts of God's word? I mean brethren He did give us 66 books didn't He? 

He even made it to where each passage has a cross reference so we can analyze and know His word even more.

Isn't that so great? Do you know what else is great?  The more I hide His word in my heart and the more I am thinking about His word, means the more His word is entering every part of me making me become more and more like Him. That's great stuff!

So tell me brethren, what do you think about? 

Lord Jesus consume our thoughts. We want to think more about You and serving You than we think about anything else. Amen

  


 

Because of Him...for YOU

I have had so many of you precious brothers and sisters ask if Godly Gossip will continue since I have moved and the answer is YES! That is the great thing about technology!

My writing will continue as long as the Lord continues to speak through me.

I want each of you to know how wonderful it is to serve you through Godly Gossip.

I hope to continue spreading God's word from person to person so that all people will have the opportunity to know Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior.

So thank You for being apart of such a wonderful calling.

Bittersweet

" I have hidden your word in my heart that I might nit sin against you." Psalm 119:11

I have known for sometime now that we would be moving BUT...how has it became the reality instead of the thought it once was? 

"You should be use to this by now, always moving, why are you so taken off guard by this reality?" I ask myself. And then I look up and see the faces of these women that have become my best friends, my
accountability and my go to let's talk Jesus girls. 

And I know why I am taken back and caught off guard. I am leaving these precious girlfriends and a Church that have stolen a piece of my heart. 

So I weep, I weep because that piece is gone, not broken or injured, just left behind, and I weep not with sadness, but with joy and anticipation, because I know God has called us to our new mission field. 

As I ponder on my situation and that of Jesus, a sense of peace and calmness come over me. For I know that when Jesus was here He kept on moving. He moved from town to town knowing that with each stop He would have the opportunity to bring others to Him. 

He did it because He is love, He did it because He was called to, He did it to glorify His Father.

So I too will continue to move to glorify Him, to be used by Him, and because I love the One who is love who had no home nor a place to lay His head.

Jesus thank You for setting the path for me and my family to follow. Thank You for using us to spread Your word. I  look forward to seeing all the amazing things You have planned for us here. Amen

What protection do you use?

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." Psalm 119:11

How has God's word kept you from sinning? In those moments of temptation how did His word protect You? Did you act on it or as I like to say, "Did you just plow through the Holy Spirit" and do what your flesh wanted?

What was the passage or passages that helped you?

Please share with us!!

Jesus not only do You protect us Yourself but You give us double the protection with Your word. Thank You! May we never stray from that protection. Amen

A change of view

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you."

Quite often I have to remind myself to step back and shift my vision upward and let the One who created all things create new thoughts and a new vision within me.

When I do that my mind is always placed on Him and others and off of me. Which is a way better sight than looking at myself.

Jesus today I am asking for a whole new line of vision, one that sees You and the need of others. Amen

Practice makes perfect

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." Psalm 119:11


Pick an area of sin you are really struggling with. Whether it be your speech, your attitude, an addiction, jealousy, pride, selfishness, etc.

Did you pick it?

Good, now draw out the word of God that is stored within you and let it begin to take over that sin. Every time you are tempted with that particular sin, start speaking that passage out loud over and over until the temptation goes away. If you have to do it all day, DO IT ALL DAY.

At the end of the day look back and see how God's word kept you from sinning against Him and journal it or write it in your Bible.

Then pick a new one tomorrow and do the same thing. After a few weeks of doing it you will begin to really see what it means to hide the word of God in your heart plus you will see how it shines out of you at the same time.

God's word is really cool like that!

Lord Your word is just so powerful and totally awesome. Thank You for making it available to each and every one of us. Amen

Take it in...Now let it out

"I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." Psalm 119:11

 Please know that to even discuss something other than the greatness of Brother Collins is so very difficult, but because he LOVED the Lord and His word SO much I know that I am not dismissing him but am carrying on with the one thing we had in common-our love for Jesus and others, so...

Let's talk some Jesus.

Do you ever reach a point when you have studied God's word and stored it with in your heart, only to walk away and do or say things that don't even reflect the very words that are stored within you? 

How can that be? How can we be full of God's word, yet act in the manner in which we do? Whether a bad attitude, an ungrateful heart, through anger, pride, jealousy, and what not. 

We do so because we are not allowing the very words stored within us to come alive. We are not putting them into practice. 

It is just like the Lord says, we have the light within us, but that light within us is only as good as we allow it to be. We can either let it shine for the entire world to see, or we can hide it under a bowl. 

"In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:16

God's word shines through us when we act on the word stored in us. Make sense?

So, today as you focus on God's word going in, focus on God's word coming out as well. 

Jesus forgive me for keeping the light of Your word in and for failing to let it out. Jesus I am asking You today that just as Your word goes in that it will also come out. Help me Jesus! It is just not possible without the help of the Holy Spirit. Amen

Let’s celebrate together

“Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!” Matthew 25:21

See the face of that precious man? It reflects Jesus in so many ways. The first and most radiant part of that face is his smile. That is the smile of true joy. It is a smile that appears naturally and at all times no matter what. No matter the pain, the sadness, and the fear, no matter what-that smile appeared on this precious man's face. That smile has an effect on people-you can never walk away from it without feeling good, or blessed, or encouraged. There is only one way a smile like that can appear on one's face, as did his, and that is by being as in love and filled with Jesus as he is.

See his eyes? Those eyes have seen Jesus at work all over this world. They have seen lives transformed, hearts restored, and illnesses healed. They have also seen the beauty, love, and joy of a woman who has been by his side for years. They have seen the blessings of his children and grandchildren. Some of the things those eyes loved watching the most was his grandchildren playing baseball, and watching Ryan stand before a church and preach about the thing he was most passionate about-Jesus. Those eyes have seen so much good and bad but today they have seen something greater and more beautiful than any of us could ever put into words. Those eyes are now seeing Jesus face to face!

See those ears? Those ears have heard the joy of people coming to know Christ. They have heard the cries of the broken; they have heard the sound of his children being born and his grandchildren being born. They have heard many prayers prayed by others; they have heard stories of victory, stories of deliverance, stories of great news and devastating news. They have heard the sound of his beautiful wife as she whispers I love you, I am proud of you, it is going to be okay, and the sound of her laughter, her cries, and her joy.  They have heard the sound of his children telling stories of growing up, and stories of their children now. They have heard his grandson preach the word of God and say his wedding vows. They have heard the word of God over and over. But today, they have heard the words they have longed to hear in a verbal audible voice "Well done, my good and faithful servant, well done. Welcome home!" Today those ears have heard the voice of Jesus.

See that mouth? That mouth has spoken wisdom, love, and has lifted its voice to the throne room on many, many occasions. It has encouraged, it has spoken boldness, it has taught, corrected, and brought comfort, all because its words came from the word of God. It left me always wanting to hear more when it opened, and brought me and so many others closer to the Lord. That mouth was controlled by the Lord. It spoke only when prompted by the Lord, it made us laugh and cry all at the same time. Anyone that ever heard him speak always walked away knowing more about Jesus than before. I loved the boldness that came from it. I loved that it was always positive even in the midst of pain and suffering. I love that today that mouth is now singing songs of praise to our Heavenly Father.

See his upper body, the part where his heart sits? That heart has felt Jesus enter in and make His home; it has felt love, joy, and peace that followed as Jesus made His place of dwelling. That heart has been so full of love for others that Jesus specifically expanded it for Him so it could hold as many people in it as possible. It has broken for the broken-hearted, mourned for those in mourning, and celebrated with those who celebrated. It has been filled up to the point of overflowing with love for Jesus' word. It has been used to its fullest potential for the sake of Jesus' name being known. It has traveled all over the world and has been left in many different places with many different people who have stolen it. It is a heart that has beat in sync with Jesus for years. And it is a heart that has been captured and given to one woman-sweet Linda. And though that heart belonged to her, it was shared with his children, their children and each of us. Thank you Linda for allowing us the privilege of being loved by that heart of his!

His arms and his hands that are attached to the upper part of that body have embraced many who he knew just needed Jesus' touch. Those arms and hands have been used to the max by Jesus and it never mattered what the situation was whether a hello hug or let me embrace you because that is what Jesus wants those arms to do, he did. And no matter how you felt at that moment when he hugged you or shook your hand, you always walked away feeling better and more blessed. They have worked hard over the years serving others for Jesus, but today they got to experience something they have never experienced before, the touch and feel of Jesus Himself. 

See his chest? That chest has been suffering from illness for quite some time, even to the point of robbing him from breathing easily and freely on his own, but today that chest is free from illness. It is free from suffering, free from pain, and free from the fight. Today he is healed, he is made new, and today he sits at the feet of Jesus feeling the warmth of His holiness, hearing the sounds of thousands of angels singing, and seeing the faces of all those who have gone before him, come and greet him. Today Brother Don Collins a man of whom I adored, admired, loved, and could never get enough of when he preached, is now in a place for which I too long to be. For that I am jealous. 

Mrs. Linda you my sweet sister are loved by all of us and we are praying God's quickest peace to come over you and your family during this time. We have been blessed to be loved by Brother Collins and you, and it is our honor to return that love to you. I hope you will rest in the closeness of His presence today as He knows your very need my sweet girl. 

Filling the holes

“I have tried my best to find you-don’t let me wander from your commands.” Psalm 119:10

At the end of the day can I look to the Lord and say, “I have done my best for You?”  Or will it be quite opposite of that and all I can show forth is that I have only wandered farther away, thus missing out on the blessings that have been put before me.

This verse has been so powerful; it is one that really cuts deep within me. It has been convicting me to the core for the last 7 days.

Honestly when I look at my actions at the end of each day, I have nothing other than the word of God to gauge my best by, and as we all know a lot of times we come up way short. Well I do anyway.

Especially lately! So last night as I cried my eyes out to my husband and laid out all my frustrations, fears, stress, and concerns (okay worries) to him, God did something I didn't quite expect.

He revealed two things.

One, that I feel insecure when it comes to Garrett.  Not because he sets out to make me feel that way, but because he is naturally just good at EVERYTHING.  Let me explain, since I have been married to Garrett I have grown to realize that there is very little that he cannot do. He really does everything. He can do all His roles as a man, plus all the roles of a woman. He cooks, he cleans, he serves, he entertains, he decorates, he shops, he always dresses nice, he is well groomed, etc.

I mean really, he fits the name our best friends gave him, Martin Stewart. (Yes honey I know you hate that, but it is so TRUE)

So the minute the Lord laid that on my heart, I expressed that to Garrett, and it was as though, God began playing both roles. He spoke to me in the quietness of my breaking heart, and then He spoke to me verbally through the mouth of my husband.

The words spoken to my heart: What do you need Kristi that will make you feel secure? What is it that will make you feel as though you are worthy and good enough? Is it the praise of man, is it the attention of others, what? If it is those things than your eyes are not on me, they are on the world, and in the world there is no security, value, or worth. Not even your husband is able to provide that need you long for, like I can.

And two, came from the mouth of Garrett:

Kristi I am a godly man because of you. I am who I am today because of you. I would not be where I am or have the relationship with Jesus that I have if it was not for your example. Because of Jesus in you, shaping me, our boys will be shaped like Jesus. Your love for the Lord, your unwavering faith and the fact that you will not compromise with sin is what I love about you the most. It is what attracted me to you the day I met you. Your faith and commitment to Jesus is intimidating, but it makes me always want to be better. Where the holes in my cup leak you fill and where your holes in your cup leak I fill.

Sigh…       

Jesus You know there is nothing else for me to say than forgive me for focusing more on the leaks in my own cup, because I have done so ,I have missed out on what You are doing in me and through me. Amen

Is it good enough?

“I have tried my best to find you-don’t let me wander from your commands.” Psalm 119:10

What does it mean to really try? Do I try to be the best mom, wife, daughter, and child of God I can be, or do I make sure I AM being the best mom, wife, daughter, and child of God?

Maybe that is the same thing, but to me, it seems as though if I only attempt to try yet come up short then did I really try in the first place.

Maybe our intentions are good, but our follow through is not so good. So I wonder, is the intention good enough for God, or is it the follow through that matters the most?

When I wake up each morning and the Holy Spirit directs my thoughts to Jesus do I only ponder on the thought that says, make sure You read today, or do I follow through with that thought which is prompting me to go and actually spend time with Him in His word.

As I meditate on this verse each word stirs within me, leaving me asking myself, when I open up my Bible and begin to spend time with the Lord, am I doing it out of habit, and because it is what I should be doing, or am I doing it solely because He is EVERYTHING to me?  

Then the groaning begins and I cry out to the Lord for revelation, clarity, and insight on what He sees within me. Am I merely trying to get by or do I really long to find more and more of Him?

Sometimes for me, trying is not enough, it is my follow through that counts.

Jesus You deserve more than just the intention or the mere thought of, “I will try.” You ask for nothing but our best, and You give nothing but Your absolute best to us. Jesus I am so thankful that You never said You would try to save us, but that You followed through and did save us. Thank You Father. Amen

Clinging

"I have tried my best to find you-don't let me wander from your commands." Psalm 119:10

This has nothing to do with anything, except it is 2:00 a.m. we have been in the ER since 10:00 and for some reason Avery and Garrett are snuggled up in the tiny bed sound asleep. 

I on the other hand, am sitting in the chair watching patients be wheeled up and down the hall wondering how in the world the doctors and nurses do this day in and day out.

It has been enough for me over the last several months to deal with two sick boys, but at the end of the day, whenever that might be; we all manage to make it through the same way-by the grace of God.

How could I ever cling to anything other than Christ-yet at times I do, whether my husband or my parents, I cling to them for the "right now" that my flesh desires.

Kind of like these patients and us, are clinging to the wisdom of the doctors to provide the medical care we need to get ourselves better, or in our case our babies better.

It is crazy how much more we cling to society and people than to Christ, and we don't even realize how bad we do it, but it is because our flesh demands right now!

Lord take my eyes off of the right now my flesh desires and place them upon You, the only who can fulfill the longing in my heart, the needs my soul cries out for, and the desperation my body has for rest, healing, comfort, and protection. Only You Jesus can satisfy, set my eyes and thoughts on You. Turn what I know into belief and action. Amen