In the season for a reason

Can I tell you something really funny?

Avery was sick all night throwing up from 11:40-5:00 this morning! No, it's not really that funny, but to me the way things have been going, at this point all I can do is laugh. 

Laughter is the best medicine to keep your sanity intact, and a little of venting and griping at your poor husband who already feels helpless. Bad, I know, and unfortunately the way I deal with things I guess. 

Not great for him AT ALL, actually really stinks for him, but he is great about it, at least he leads me to believe so. 

So guess what the Lord has been teaching me all morning?

Three things!

1. "Love is patient and kind. Love is NOT jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does NOT demand its own way. Love is NOT irritable (yeah, totally failing big time on this one), and it keeps NO record of when it has been wronged. It is NEVER glad about injustice but rejoiced whenever the truth wins out. Love NEVER gives up, NEVER loses faith, is always hopeful, and ENDURES through every circumstance. Love will last forever." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

            ** I have some work to do. Okay A LOT of work to do. 

2. "But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times (Garrett would not have described me as being gentle in my words at 4 this morning), and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no partiality and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of goodness." James 3:17-18

           ** Goodness, I have a feeling I am going to sit in this state until I get the lesson He is teaching me. I am going to get it, even if I have to be here a year, because the growth and development of strength and character is SO worth it!

And finally

3. " What is causing the quarrels and fights among you? Isn't it the whole army of evil desires at war within you? You want what you don't have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous for what others have, and you can't possess it, so you fight and quarrel to take it away from them. And yet the reason you don't have what you want is that you don't ask God for it. And even when you do ask, you don't get it because your whole motive is wrong-you want only what will give you pleasure." James 4:1-3

         **Yeah, that one hurt! Really hurt! I might not be literally killing Garrett but I am killing his heart by my words and actions. Even though this season in our life is E-X-T-R-M-E-L-Y stressful, I still must remain loving just as Christ is loving with me. 

-Oh, goodness brethren this season I know is for no other reason than some major purifying within me and it is hard. Right now I am just trying to figure out WHY IN THE WORLD I am clinging to this control and self and not letting go in order to move to the amazing season of life God has waiting for me. 

All I know is that Jesus I am listening! I hear You and I am listening so please DON'T GIVE UP ON ME! You either G! I want so badly to say I am trying but that is a mere word, I know my actions need to kick in and kick in quick!

Driving His point home through…love notes

 “You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully.” Psalm 119:4

Check out the verse of the day on Bible gateway. “The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery,” “You shall not murder,” “You shall not steal,” “You shall not covet,” and whatever other command there may be, are summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.” Romans 13:9-10

How cool is that? I love how God always backs up what I am studying with other scripture. Kind of like He is driving His point home, all while leaving little love notes throughout my day.

For me the last part of this verse would sum up what the Pharisee’s missed and what we often miss as well. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

Love it is what binds all things together, and it is found in God who is love.

Awe, the beauty of His majesty and word, I am obsessed, completely obsessed!

Prayer: Jesus thank You for always bringing me back to the exact point You are trying to make. I love finding Your love notes throughout the day and how each one of them comes from a different place in Scripture. You are the most marvelous Savior, lover and friend. Praise You Jesus! Amen 

What Not to Do

"You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully.” Psalm 119:4

One must be very careful not to get caught up in being a law (commandment) follower that they lose sight of God’s grace, forgiveness and love. Believe me it’s easy to do, follow the law, and think that it is good enough.

 

The Pharisee’s painted the perfect picture of what NOT to do and Jesus points them in out in Matthew 23.

He begins by saying, “The teachers of religious law and the Pharisees are the official interpreters of the Scriptures. So practice and obey whatever they say to you but DON’T follow their example. For they DON’T practice what they teach.  They crush you with impossible religious demands and never lift a finger to help ease the burden.”

They only obey God’s word to make themselves look good.

Everything they do is a show

They exalt themselves

They thrive on attention and being called “Rabbi”

They love to sit at the head table

They tithe even the tiniest part of their income, yet ignore justice, mercy, and faith.

They only clean up the outside of themselves all while the inside is filthy full of greed, self-indulgence, hypocrisy and lawlessness.

They act spiritual in hopes of covering up their own sin

The Pharisees based their faith on the law instead of on Jesus Christ. They completely missed the mark because they were so full of SELF.

We can very easily become the same way if we are not careful. We can speak all spiritual, yet never put God’s word into practice. We can show up at church only for show and politics, we can cover up our filth on the inside by making sure the outside of us is clean, we can even confess we love Jesus and call ourselves Christians, yet still live like the world.

 It is easy to say those things do not describe us, yet if we really stopped and asked the Lord to evaluate us and to reveal our purpose for worshiping Him we would be surprised at what He reveals to us. 

God calls us to action-He called His Son to action and Jesus set the perfect example for us to follow. He not only obeyed the law, He lived it out and fulfilled it.

We are commanded to keep His law carefully, however we are commanded to live out, apply, put into action, and practice it as well. Our obedience means nothing if it is not put into action and if it is done without love it is pointless.

To me, the reason the Pharisees were such miserable people is because privately they realized every second just how sinful they were and that made them bitter, thus acting in the manner in which they did. They even went so far as to make sure everyone else felt the way they did, thus forcing impossible religious demands that could never be met.

Oh, the sweetness of Christ’s love and the covering of His blood.

Prayer: Jesus thank You for coming down and showing us the right example in which to follow. Most of all thank You for taking the burden and sin upon Yourself and making it possible to be found perfect in the sight of God because of Your blood. Amen

I will not worry, I will not worry, I WILL NOT WORRY!

“You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully.” Psalm 119:4

Dax has not eaten since his surgery Monday! Yup that is a total of 6 days our little guy will not eat! I don’t know if it is because of the sores he has on his tongue, or if it is because the antibiotics he is taking makes him sick and curbs his appetite, but whatever the reason HE WILL NOT EAT!

Since I have been studying this verse I couldn’t help but to put into a little practice by telling Dax, “Mommy commands you to eat!” that of course did not go over well with him, nor did anyone else find it humorous but me.

He is drinking tons which is great but is not enough to nourish his little body, and he is little! We have tried pedisure (which even I think is nasty), milkshakes, smoothies, yogurt, ice cream, and any and all other horrible and good food under the sun.

As a result of not eating we have had to take him off of his antibiotics in hopes that once it gets out of his system he will regain the desire to eat.

This to me is the most important right now.  I love this little thing and it devastates me to see him feel so bad to the point of not wanting to eat.

We are making very “little” strides though and if we have to give him pedisure through a syringe every 5 minutes we will.

The crazy thing about all of this is he is still running around non-stop and no one would ever be able to tell he didn’t feel good. I guess it is because he has been sick for so long now he just knows how to deal with it and thinks it is normal.

Jesus “commands” me not to worry and today I will not worry. God loves my little guy more than I ever could and I am resting in that precious thought today.

Prayer: Jesus thank You that I can rest in the thought of Your control and not worry about Dax because I know and believe You are taking care of him. Give us the wisdom and discernment to know exactly what needs to be done and instill the desire within him to eat. Jesus I give You all the control. Amen

Because He tells me to

“You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully.” Psalm 119:4

In 1 John 2:3-5 says, “And how can we be sure that we belong to him? By obeying his commandments.  If someone says, ‘I belong to God,’ but doesn’t obey God’s commandments that person is a liar and does not live in the truth. But those who obey God’s word really do love him.”

My love for God is shown by my obedience to Him. So if I claim to love God and belong to Him then I must:

Forgive because He tells me to-Matthew 6:14/Ephesians 4:32

Confess my sins because He tells me to- 1 John 1:9

Repent from my sins because He tells me to-Matthew 3:2

Love because He tells me to-1 Corinthians 13/Romans 13:10/Mark 12:29-30/ 1 John 2: 7

Die to self because He tells me to-Luke 9:23

Trust Him because He tells me to-Romans 10:8

Be joyful because He tells me to-Romans 12:12/ 1 Thessalonians 5:16

Control my tongue because He tells me to-James 3

Respect my husband because He tells me to-Ephesians 5:33

Don’t complain or argue because He tells me to-Philippians 2:14

Follow His example because He tells me to-Ephesians 5:1

Take no part in evil instead rebuke it because He tells me to-Ephesians 5:11

Tell the truth because He tells me to-Ephesians 4:26

Don’t be bitter or angry, don’t gossip or speak harsh words because He tells me not to-Ephesians 4:31

Don’t be misled because He says so-Galatians 6:7

Don’t get discouraged and give up because He says so-Galatians 6:9

Stay pure because He tells me to-1 Timothy 2:21

Stand in confidence because He tells me to-1 Thessalonians 5:8

Be devoted to prayer because He tells me to- Colossians 4:2

Don’t worry because He tells me not to- Philippians 4:6

Work hard and cheerfully because He tells me to-Colossians 3:23

Put to death sinfulness and earthly things because He tells me to-Colossians 3:5

Fix my thoughts on His word because He tells me to-Philippians 4:8

Believe I am loved and adored because He tells me to-Psalm 139

Don’t commit adultery because He tells me not to-Matthew 5:27

Don’t get a divorce because He tells me not to-Matthew 5:31

Don’t judge others because He tells me not to-Matthew 7:1

Eat from His word because He tells me to-Matthew 4:4

Don’t cause others to stumble because He tells me not to-Matthew 18:7

Love Him, Praise Him, Honor Him, Believe in Him, Share Him, and obey Him because He tells me to!

Oh my goodness there are SO many more but this is enough for now.

Prayer: Jesus this is just a fraction of what You command of me, and You only command it of me because You love me, created me, adore me, and desire for me to be Holy like You are Holy.  I want to obey all of these, not just because You have charged me to, but because I love You and desire to please You, honor You, glorify You and reflect You. Help me do so every second of every day. Convict me and teach me when I begin to disobey. Amen

ALL, ALL, ALL, ALL, is what is commanded of me.

"You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully." Psalm 119:4

The greatest commandment is the one I fail living out and obeying the most. I guess you could say it is the one I pick and choose which part I want to obey. Not because I deliberately do so, but because I get caught up in self.

AND I HATE IT!

"The most important commandment is this: Hear, O Israel! The Lord our God is the one and only Lord. And you must love him with ALL your heart, ALL your soul, ALL your mind, and ALL your strength." Mark 12:29-30

Jesus tells me very specifically.

Love ME with ALL of you. Put ME before you put yourself, others, or things. I am telling you to do this, not giving you the option. I am not even going to tell you it is okay if you only love ME with part of you, because you are saving the other part for your pleasure. Nope that is not okay with ME! 

You obey ME by loving ME with ALL you have in you. 

O He deserves every bit of my love and obedience. It brings me to my knees to think of how little I have loved and obeyed Him because I have been selfish.

Prayer: Jesus I confess to You today that I have been obeying the greatest commandment with only a part of me. You deserve it ALL, You ask for it ALL, and I want to give You my ALL. Don't help me, MAKE ME! I don't want free will anymore because I am to weak. Amen

So what are yours?

 “You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully.” Psalm 119:4

What are some of the commandments you keep carefully?

This is a very interesting question to me, but the answers are even more interesting than the question.

We are choosers to the max. We choose, choose, and choose…all that benefits self.

So I am curious, what commandments do you keep carefully?

We are to keep them ALL carefully. God did not give us options and we should not live as though we have options.

Prayer: Jesus my faithfulness to You reveals my love for You and if I am picking and choosing what commandments I keep carefully, my love is only half of what You have asked. You want ALL of it. You deserve ALL of it and You made it possible to do so. Thank You Jesus, fill my heart to the fullness You so desire. Amen

Update

"You have charged us to keep your commandments carefully." Psalm 119:4 

God has been good brethren! Dax did get to have surgery, fever and all, Praise God!

It has been a rough couple of days for our little guy, but I know God's hand is upon him.

We did have to go back today for a quicker follow-up due to some issues he had, and we found out the bacteria that was flushed out has already grown back and is sitting on the right side of his face.

So...

Well it is just so for now.

I love each of you who are praying and cannot tell you how amazing it is to know you love our baby and us that much.

It has been a true blessing to have friends and a church family that love you so much they stop everything they are doing to be there for you.

Thank you for being Jesus in the flesh Sharron!

Stephanie S. thank you for taking on the role of mommy to a third child for me and tending to Avery as though he is your own.

Dusti thank you for being Jesus' servant and meeting our needs with the groceries. Awesome!

JuJu thank you for loving my baby as much as I do!

Mom and dad well I have no words-just beyond precious and amazing!

We are blessed! God is so good to us!

To each of you praying and calling and texting. Thank you for thinking of us throughout your busy day!

O' God is good and we are just basking in His beauty and waiting for Him to give us clarity!

Jesus I love You and praise You for being the greatest comforter. You are our deepest need and we long for more of You! Thank You for being in control and for guiding us thus far. You are truly the best thing in my life. 

The Surgery really needs to happen…pray it will be possible

“They do not compromise with evil, and they walk only in his paths.” Psalm 119:3

It is 4:00 a.m. and we are headed to the hospital. Dax is sleeping and has no clue what he is about to go through. Part of me is relieved by that and the other part of me finds it kind of cruel.

Right now I am full of emotion because I know how important this surgery is, and how BADLY it needs to happen today! All I know is that right now I am praying like crazy that the surgery does NOT get postponed because of how sick Dax is.  Please pray that as well! He really needs this to happen!

I am tired, Garrett is tired, and Avery, Praise God, is still sleeping at our precious friend’s house. That is a relief but I do hate being away from Him.

I am thankful that my precious daddy drove 9 hours last night to be here with us and help me since Garrett has to leave to go back to Jasper and work. Pray for him it is hard for him to leave us, especially with all of this going on.

Oh, praise God for my parents who have always dropped everything to be there when we needed them. I am so thankful, I am so thankful, because honestly I am so worn out, I need help, and who better than your mommy and daddy.

God is in control, plus it is Valentine’s Day today and to know that I am going to get to spend it with the five most precious men in my life (Jesus, G, Avery, Dax, and my Daddy) makes me so happy.

Jesus as we head down the road to the hospital I ask for Your hand of protection to be upon us as we travel. I ask that You prepare the hands, hearts, and minds of the doctors, nurses, and everyone else who will be involved in Dax's surgery. Lord I ask above that, come down and be them. May Your hands literally and visibly be upon Dax. I ask for there to be answers, I ask for a quick surgery, and I ask for quick healing. Jesus You know the importance and need for this surgery, so please let it be possible. Jesus I love You, I trust You, and I ask that You walk before us. Jesus be among us every step, every minute, and in every decision. Jesus I just want You to receive all the honor and glory through every stage of this. Amen

It’s TEMPORARY

“They do not compromise with evil, and they walk only in his paths.” Psalm 119:3

Today I am talking it one step at a time, making sure to walk in His path and not get distracted or overwhelmed by the series of trials coming my way.

My baby is due for surgery tomorrow morning and since midnight he has been running a high fever, has thrown up, can’t breathe, and has nasty gook coming out of his eyes, all while still running around non-stop as though this is a “normal” way of living for him.  

And that makes me SICK, but I also know it is NOTHING compared to what others who are terminally ill face day to day, so for that I am ever so grateful!

I do not know why the song Shout to the Lord keeps playing over and over in my head, but it does. There is something about every single word in that song that brings a sense of peace, comfort, and calmness to my soul. I just can’t explain, but I wish I could somehow allow you to feel it so you would know. Maybe these words will help.

My comfort, my shelter,
Tower of refuge and strength
Let every breath, all that I am

Never cease to worship You

I know right now that God is so good and no matter what, my love and trust in Him is not going to falter. You see I have such a greater love for Jesus than I do my own heartbeat, breath, or self. 

I have so much faith and trust in Him to take care of my baby no matter the outcome. Because His will, His works, His plan is far greater than what I could ever come up with. It is far greater than even the doctor’s plans. So I am going to sit here and trust that all of this stuff that is going on, the fever, the nasty eyes, the fever, the vomiting, the fever is…well, one because we live in a fallen sinful world, and two because all of this is going to lead to something God is working out. Because He is in control and He knows all things.

AND

Because my son is so important to Him and if He doesn’t even let a sparrow fall without His permission, He is not going to let His own child live in a permanent state of sickness.

I also am praising God that this is temporary and I keep telling myself and Dax that. This is temporary!

This suffering is temporary

The fever is temporary

The frustration is temporary

The guessing game is temporary

The trials are temporary

It is all TEMPORARY and I am clinging to that promise, but more so I am going to live it out through my obedience and trust in the one True God.

Prayer: Lord Jesus You are my comfort and my shelter. You are my tower of refuge and strength. May my every breath and all that I am never cease to worship You. Amen

.

His hands at work

"They do not compromise with evil, and they walk only in his paths." Psalm 119:3


Have you heard the song Shout to the Lord? It is one of my favorite songs, especially the part that says,

I sing for joy at the work of His hands
Forever I'll love Him forever I'll stand.
Nothing compares to the promise 
I have in You.


Well tonight I got to see just how amazing the work of His hands are through the lives of some very special people.

O, brethren God is good, He is good at ALL times, and I mean ALL times... good, bad, and ugly. His works are amazing, His love is amazing, He alone is amazing.

Prayer: Jesus I sing for JOY at the work of YOUR hands. Forever I'll love YOU forever I will stand. Nothing in, I mean nothing compares to YOU. Amen

The Hail Storm

“They do not compromise with evil, and they walk only in his paths.” Psalm 119:3

My friend sent me a text saying, “When it rains it pours.” My response, “Honey it’s not pouring its hailing.”

Well what am I going to do during this hail storm? I am going to run and seek protection from the Lord. Instead of try and create my own protection, which only consists of compromise. I am going to walk in His path where His umbrella is held above me 24/7 all the way to eternity.

Are you being hailed on today? If so seek the protection of Jesus.

Prayer: Jesus in the midst of this hail storm I ask that You keep me safe and protect me from compromising with my flesh to create my own protection. There is not a safer place to be than under Your protection. Thank You that this storm is temporary. Amen

The virtues He has set for me

“They do not compromise with evil, and they walk only in his paths.” Psalm 119:3

So yesterday morning I woke up in a puddle of pee, NO not my own, Dax’s. Yes my boys are sleeping with me, because daddy is gone and I feel better that way.

So we get up after a long night of taking temps and giving medicine, get a bath and attempt to eat breakfast. Avery thought he could handle a bowl of spaghetti, yes for breakfast, but it was not until the first bite came right back up that he realized maybe spaghetti was not the best thing to eat. We both did, I was just thrilled he even wanted to eat.

So we get all cleaned up AGAIN, I got him cozied on the couch, and head back to the room to strip the bed and get the nasty sheets washed when I heard Avery screaming. I run into the living room to see him throwing up again all over the blanket, couch and himself.

I did grab the puke bowl, gross I know, but life, and he finished up. So AGAIN we get all cleaned up settled again and back to a calm state, whatever that is.

I resume back to mommy cleaning mode and by the grace of God I got this house we call a home put back to order after weeks off. I got my fix of Lysol spraying, bleach, and floors mopped and scrubbed in every crevasse they exist in.

As I was enjoying cleaning, ye s I really do enjoy it, I began thinking about how crazy these last couple of months have been when I was reminded that this is a part of my role as a woman, to tend to my home and my family. It is the path the Lord has set for me and when I refuse, gripe, or complain about that role, I am compromising with evil and telling the Lord I don’t like this role which He has given me.

The Lord brought to my attention the woman of Proverbs 31. She was “happy” because she loved the Lord, was obedient, and fulfilled her role with grace and dignity and therefore God blessed her.

I might not fit all the virtues of the Proverbs 31 woman, but I can fit and fulfill with happiness, grace and dignity the virtues the Lord has set for me. Even in the middle of trials, frustration, transition, and purification. The Lord never said life would be easy, but He promised to always be there!

I do not want to compromise with evil and demand my wants to be met, when my needs are met every day by the Creator Himself.  For me brethren that is enough to relish in and cling to, it is even enough for me to find happiness in and motivation to keep moving forward in His path.

Because He is perfecting James 1:2-4 within me, “Dear brothers and sisters, whenever trouble comes your way, let it be an opportunity for joy. For when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be strong in character and ready for anything.”  And all this will be a result because of your obedience.

Prayer: Lord I am beginning to see that some of the greatest lessons I have learned have been through the toughest of trials. I can truly see today how You are fulfilling James 1:2-4 within me. Thank You Jesus. Amen

Stick with the theme

“They do not compromise with evil, and they walk only in his paths.” Psalm 119:3

Every verse in Psalm 119 describes and refers back to one word, obedience. You could say it is the theme the Lord has set for us, and He reminds us of the theme throughout all 176 verses. It also states the emotion and character of the one who remains obedient, happy. And I desire real happiness which is JOY. 

“Happy” are the ones full of integrity who follow the law of the Lord. “Happy” are those who obey His decrees and search for him with all their hearts. And “happy” are those who do NOT compromise with evil but walk ONLY in His paths. (Paraphrased)

I cannot expect to walk in the path of the Lord if I am not reading His word to know what path is His. Nor can I expect to remain obedient if I am not reading His word. And that brethren is an oxymoron anyway because if we are not even reading His word than we are already NOT being obedient!

His path is far more than just being good or mentioning His name here and there. His path is far more than just going to church. It is an intimate and personal relationship with Him. It is sticking to the theme He has set, obedience! And we do so by READING HIS WORD!

You either choose that path daily or you choose to compromise with evil which leads to your own path.

Prayer: Jesus You said if we want to truly follow You, we must put aside our selfish ambition, shoulder our cross daily and follow You. We must be willing to lose and give up everything and follow You. And we must not compromise with evil but stand firm in Your word. Help us do just that today all while staying with Your theme. Amen

Weary and Worn

Today I am tired-extremely tired, emotionally, physically, and mentally.  As I was headed home from the Dr today half asleep I could honestly hear the Lord whisper, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28


Our God is good! He knew I needed to hear those words and can I tell you how sweet they sounded. They have played over and over in my head all evening.


Maybe you are tired too, tired from battling sickness, or a broken marriage. Maybe you are tired from your job, or a draining relationship. Maybe you are just tired for no other reason than just being tired.

Whatever the reason may be, let's just run to Jesus and receive the rest our weary souls need.

Prayer: Jesus I come falling into Your arms weary and worn asking for rest and praising You for the rest I am about to receive. I pray for all those who are weary and worn as well, may they come to You for rest. Amen

Thank You...Please keep praying!

"Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts." Psalm 119:2


I wanted to thank everyone for your prayers and words of encouragement through this crazy time. You have no idea how much it means to us to know you are praying. Thank you, thank you!

The Lord is working everything out and is setting everything up as He sees fit, and for that, we are so grateful. Honestly I am glad because as scattered brained as I am I don't think I would do any of us any good.

If you would please just keep praying. Pray for Garrett and I and our marriage, pray for Avery who is sick as I type with 103 fever and pray for Dax. Dax will be beginning surgery Monday February 14th followed by another procedure February 24th to test for Cystic Fibrosis. Then off to the Neurosurgeon March 2nd.

I just keep remembering our passage this week and claiming that "happy" part over our family as we seek the Lord and obey His decrees.

It's tough and Satan is doing all he can to attack us, but all I have to say is, "Bring it on Satan! I serve a Mighty Mighty God who is greater and more powerful than you will ever be."

Prayer: Jesus thank You, thank You for my brothers and sisters who are praying for us. Bless them Lord, bless them in an awe-inspiring way today. O, and Jesus, thank You for knowing that one of our greatest needs would be to have brothers in sisters in Christ help us through the ups and downs of life. Amen

Make Jesus the most watched

"Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts." Psalm 119:2

The Superbowl is probably one of the most watched events in the world. As I am sitting here looking at all the people that are there, I can’t help but to think, what if we searched and followed Jesus like we do our favorite football team.

What if each week our churches were filled with that many people? Jesus is worth way more than the entertainment of football and this is coming from a wife to a football coach.

He is even more entertaining and interesting.  People just don’t think so because they don’t see Him, but if we would get into His word more, we would realize it.

Now don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with watching it or even loving it, but if it is more of a priority than Jesus than that is a problem.

Prayer: Lord the entertainment Your word offers is wonderful and I pray that more and more people would see and realize that when they open Your word and read it. Amen

Evaluating what we are searching for

"Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts." Psalm 119:2

We search for a cure, we search for answers, we search for the perfect job, we search for our spouse, we search for the right house, we search for ways to make more money, we search for the best doctors, and we search for the best counselors, church, and even friendships.

Not only do we search for all those things, but we search for ways to meet our needs and our wants and we go to any extent to do so, thus putting our whole heart into it.

The problem with putting our whole heart into those things is that they will never fulfill us and their temporary satisfaction is just that, temporary.

Through this phase in my life I have begun to realize some very valuable lessons when searching for the Lord and obeying His laws.

1.  I can read and study God’s word 24/7, but if I don’t listen it defeats the purpose.
2. I can search for the Lord, but if I am only putting half my heart into it than I am not giving Him or myself the very best we both deserve.
3. I can search and study God’s word, but if I don’t apply it I am not going to make a difference in my life or in others.
4. I can say I am a believer,  I can go to church, I can even be a good person morally, but if I am picking and choosing parts of His word to obey, or doing any of it for my own glory, than I am placing myself above Him.

My goal of doing the S.S.A.L.S (Study, Store, Apply, Learn, and Share) was and is to learn more about our amazing Creator and walk away after one year having stored more of His word in my heart. And through these last 36 weeks today I have learned that I must search and put all of my heart, soul, mind, and strength into. For then I can expect great change in my life, my family’s life, and all those around me. Plus walk away happy!

Prayer: Jesus I need You more than I need the ability to breathe. Amen

S-E-A-R-C-H

"Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts." Psalm 119:2

Do you know what is so great about searching for Jesus? He can always be found, even when we are not looking. He is just that great! And He tells us to search for Him at all times and with all our hearts.

So search…

Search even when you don’t feel like it.

Search when you are tired

Search when you are sad

Search when you are hurting

Search when you are afraid

Search when you are worried

Search when you are sick

Search when you feel like life is falling apart

Search when your marriage is falling apart

Search when you are angry

Search when you are bitter

Search when you are happy

Search when you are joyful

Search when you feel good

Search when you are in the middle of trials

Search when you are tempted

Search even when you feel like giving up-especially when you feel like giving up

Just keep SEARCHING!

Prayer: Lord teach me how to search for You with all my heart, at all times, in my ups, downs, my good times and my bad. Thank You for always being found. Amen

Unexpected News

  

"Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts." Psalm 119:2

(Monday Jan 31, 2011)

Dax and I headed in for his second round of allergy testing and a CT scan to follow later that day. The first round of testing was quick and simple and went better than I thought, which was only because he did not have an allergic reaction to anything in the environment or to animals.

I was kind of expecting the same thing with this second round which consisted of food, but I was hoping he would have some reaction because then we would be able to fix by removing it and make him feel better, but again just like round one, nothing.

As the frustration set in with the doctor and myself we both agreed we had to keep ruling out things until we found out why our little busy thing never felt good, so off for some lunch and then over to the hospital for the CT scan.

Dax and I loaded up and headed off to some very needed Chick-fil-a ! We finished up our lunch, grabbed a quick ride on one of the dollar rides, and headed for the car and straight to the hospital.

Dax of course fell right to sleep on the way, which was great because it gave me some time to visit with the Lord. We discussed the procedure and I asked Him to help Dax be very calm and still and to give us a really sweet CT tech that would be quick and comforting, which He did, she was great.

So we get in there, lay him down on the table and she wraps him up and places a vest over the top of him to help cut down on the amount of radiation. During that time Dax started to get scared and uncomfortable,so I leaned down to tell him how cool it is going to be and if he stays really still he might be able to see Buzz Light-year fly by.

 That went over great and he got really still, which allowed her to run back and start the test. She did her thing and then got up to come in and I was thinking sweet that was quick,  but she walked in readjusted Dax and said she needed to do it one more time because it didn’t come out as clear as she wanted it to. Dax still looking for Buzz began to get a little upset but stayed still. I was so PROUD of him-my baby is getting big!

So we finished up and headed home to pick up Avery from school. I love driving because it allows for a lot of great discussions with the Lord. This discussion; Lord let everything be okay and help us figure out why he has been sick.

            -Fast Forward to 8:45-

The boys are fed, bathed, and in bed, G is in Jasper and I am sitting in my chair unwinding, when my phone rings.

“Kristi this is Dr. Sharky, I am looking over Dax’s CT scan and he is full of fluid. He is completely blocked behind his cheeks, his eyes, and partially blocked between his eyes. He also has fluid in both ears, plus the CT scan shows that Dax has a cyst on his brain.”

My exact response, “Ok”

Dr. Sharky, “Kristi I am an Allergy and Immunologist so I know nothing about this, but I will be happy to refer you to a neurologist. And as far as the fluid goes we need to get him into an ENT so they can take a culture of the bacteria that is sitting and has been sitting in your son’s face- In other words surgery.”

Me, “Ok”

We finish up our conversation I hang up and sit there a minute absorbing all this new information that I WAS SO NOT PREPARED FOR.

I call my husband share the news and here we are today, wading through all of this and believing in God’s power and healing ability.

We have made good and bad decisions, we have bickered to no end due to stress of a new job, a move, and now this, but we know that right now we need to put our frustrations, worries, and fears aside and stand firm in the Lord.

So if you would, PRAY-pray for Dax, our family, and the doctors! It would mean more to us than you will ever know.

Prayer: Lord we know You are in control and we know You are right here with us giving us the peace and comfort we have today. We pray for Your will to be done and we thank You for what You are going to do. Amen

Don’t expect happiness

 “Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts.” Psalm 119:2

Today the perfect opportunity arose for me to seek out the Lord with all my heart and allow Him to make the best decision for my family. And do you know what I did with that opportunity? The complete opposite of what I should have.

Because I chose to act off of my emotions and seek audible advice first, God once again intervened and got my attention, and I must say, when we choose the opposite of His word you can be sure that “happy” is NOT what you are or feel. How could I expect to be happy when I did the opposite of what makes me happy? I can’t and I shouldn’t expect it either.

Learning to seek God is learning to trust Him to answer and when He does peace and happiness will always be sure to follow!

So as of now the decision has been made and I am praying and BELIEVING that this amazing God of whom I serve is in control and is working all things out for the health of our baby.

If I could give any advice to whomever even takes time to read this blog (thank you by the way) it would be to SEEK God first! Don’t act off of your emotions but off of the leading of the Holy Spirit and trust in His power and leading.

Then no matter what, it will all be great because it was His leading and His decision, which is far greater and more important anyway!

Prayer: Lord thank You for teaching me a very valuable lesson today. Thank You for making this verse come alive and for showing me the importance of seeking You first. Thank You for the audible advice I did receive because it came from those who love us the most, but who also love You more! Amen

It’s not in the idea, it’s in the name!

 “Happy are those who obey his decrees and search for him with all their hearts.” Psalm 119:2

Whether it is peace, happiness, joy, love, money, success, or friendship, we search for it. We search for it in hopes to fill or even satisfy the longing that resides within us.

Some of us spend our lives searching for these things and we miss out on the one thing that is the most important and satisfying.

JESUS

The Author of this Psalm experienced happiness because he searched for God the author, creator, inventor and giver of the very things he longed for and that we long for today. It was not the idea of what he thought would make him happy, joyful, successful, loved, or have lots of friends. It was filling his whole heart with the one who owns them and lavishes him with them.

Through our obedience and our whole hearted search to know Jesus our thoughts and feelings will begin to reflect not the idea but the name.

Prayer: Lord Jesus I want the happiness that comes from my desire to obey and search for You with all of my heart. Not the idea of what I think will make me happy. From my own experience the joy I feel when I am with You is greater than any joy I could ever try and create myself.  Thank You for the joy Your name alone brings to me. Amen

Joy…ful of integrity

“Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the Lord.” Psalm 119:1

It is moments like tonight when you receive unexpected news that test your integrity, and not really so much your integrity but your faith. Which to me go hand in hand.

I have come to realize tonight the reason the Author starts out this Psalm with the word “Happy or Joyful.” It is because those who exhibit Christ-like integrity are also those who have received that eternal joy.

For me that eternal joy is capable of starring stress, sorrow, pain, frustration, sickness, and even unexpected not-so-good news, in the face and still be joyful because of the fact that those things don’t even compare and are not even capable of robbing eternal God-given joy.

AMAZING joy!

Prayer: Lord fix our thoughts on that eternal joy. May we never allow our thoughts to fixate on stress, sorrow, pain, or sickness. We know that You who is in us is greater. Amen

Integrity is developed in the privacy of our quiet time with the Lord

“Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the Lord.” Psalm 119:1

Integrity to me is something you can’t put on when you walk out in public, just like you can’t pretend to know the law of the Lord and use it when it is necessary.

Integrity is something God clothes us in when we study His law and make it a part of our everyday life. It is done in the privacy of our quiet time with Him.  

Jesus is seen through those who are clothed in the integrity of His word! Their lives display honesty, and they do not compromise with evil, the world, or sin. They are full of Jesus and not the corruption of lies, gossip, deceit, anger, jealousy, pride, greed, or self.

Prayer: Lord silence our lips and let our real integrity show.  Amen

Tiny men of integrity!

"Happy are people of Integrity, who follow the law of the Lord." Psalm 119:1

Right now I am sitting on the floor in our bathroom watching my two precious boys play in the tub. From where I am sitting all I can see are there sweet little heads peeking at me from over the top of the tub and it makes my heart leap with joy-truly leap in a way that only Jesus could make it leap. Thank You Jesus!

You know what else makes my heart leap? Knowing that one day these two babies now 4 and 2 will one day grow up to be men of integrity who follow the law of the Lord. I know that because I believe it! I believe they are His right now! 

I hear the passion they have for Jesus through their prayers and at night when they listen as we read the Bible together! I see it in their actions and it reassures me Jesus is alive within them.

I believe it because I pray it over them and I know that if G and I are living our lives with integrity and following His laws-so will they! 

I also believe when we make Jesus and His word seem like a food, drug, or drink we can't live without, so will they!

I just believe God is going to use these two boys to do some really, really amazing things for His glory!

I told you my view was great!

Prayer: Lord control every area of their lives. Fill them with a type of hunger for You that goes way beyond the occasional feeding of Your word. Let it be a hunger that lasts forever, never growing old, or getting full. Amen

Until then

“Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the Lord. “ Psalm 119:1

We are sitting in the motel tonight and our two year old so far has done everything he has been told NOT to do. Finally after the millionth time (yes should have stopped at one) Garrett grabbed him and got his attention and then made the following comment.

“He is the perfect example of living in the flesh. He does everything he is not supposed to.”

That comment was so true, not because he was being bad but because as of right now our two boys are living in the flesh and will continue until they ask Jesus to come live in their hearts and be their personal Lord and Savior.

I must say I do believe our 4 year old has sincerely done that and when the time is right the Lord will impress upon his heart to follow him in baptism. And I know “bubba” will follow!

It is a hard realization but one that is very real. I know this fleshly living will not last long because I already see their love and need for Jesus developing and I also believe that a child is never too young to grasp and understand the importance of Jesus.

Until then we will continue to teach them the word of God, we will continue to teach them the importance of pleasing Jesus and living for Him and in His timing it will all be perfect and they will sense Him calling!

Prayer: Lord Jesus hasten the day! Amen

The Oxygen in my blood

"Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the Lord." Psalm 119:1

How do you live out this verse? How do you actually apply it to your life and make it become an action?

How do you apply any of God’s word to your life? By obeying it, right, well that is easier said than done, and for the life of me I don’t get it, especially when you love Jesus so much. Just maybe it is because we are in a constant spiritual warfare, or maybe because we try to be in control and do it ourselves, of which I am also realizing is another big struggle of mine.

I know right now, at this very moment that if I want to apply Psalm 119:1 to my life then I need every word to penetrate to the core of my bones and all throughout my mind. In order to get God’s word to those places I have to say it over and over and over and over. One time will not suffice.

God’s word needs to become the oxygen in my blood.

I want to be full of Him and His word so much, yet I, at times pick and choose the things I want from His word to be full of.  Does that even make sense?

Do you know what else needs to be done? I need to get out of the way and let the Holy Spirit take control-which is SO HARD at times!

Prayer: Jesus teach me to put mySELF aside so the great Counselor can take control. Keep Your word constantly on the forefront of my mind. Thank You that Your word never comes back void. Amen

Clean Slate

“Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the LORD.” Psalm 119:1

The Press: “You must have a lot of money Garrett.”

Garrett: chuckling, “Why is that?”

The Press: “Because we called tons of people and dug around to try and find something on you, but we never found anything, nor did we ever hear one negative thing about you. You must have had to pay a lot of people.”  The press laughing

Garrett: speechless

That was a recent conversation my husband had at the School Board meeting upon waiting to be hired as the new Athletic Director/Head Football Coach in Jasper TX.

It was a conversation that has lingered in my mind and one that has made our passage come alive in a way that could be seen and heard. It is always wonderful to hear people say good things about your husband, but this good thing surpassed them all.

My husband whom I have always thought of as a man of great integrity was literally clothed in it. He is a man of honesty who does not compromise with evil or corruption. He is that “person” who is happy because he follows the law of the Lord. And all people who meet him and know him see that within him and that my brethren is something I admire and hope to be clothed in as well. Not for the sake of praise from man, but because of the happiness that comes from it, and because of the pleasure it brings to our Heavenly Father.  

Prayer: Lord Jesus thank You for clothing my husband in integrity and for the happiness that falls off of him because of it. May we all strive to live lives that are full of integrity because we follow Your law. Lord we love You and we want to show You our love by living out Your word. Help us to do so. Amen

The longest book…bring it on!

      

"Happy are people of integrity, who follow the law of the Lord." Psalm 119:1

Awhile back the Lord impressed upon me to study Psalm 119 and to store it. So I have been doing just that and have challenged my precious college babies to join me. 

Just today I was texting them to see how they were coming along when it dawned on me to challenge all my brothers and sisters to study and memorize Psalm 119.

I know so many of us already have verses out of this book memorized which will make it even more special, fun, and exciting when you come to it. Also we will do one verse a week, that way we have enough time to really study it, store it, and live it out.

So join us, the more the merry and the better the accountability. If you are up for it shoot us a comment. We would love to hear from you and also it will help us all keep one another accountable.

If you want we would also love to hear what God teaches you from each verse. You can email me and I will copy and paste it, or place it in the comments section. 

I am super excited, there is nothing I love more than basking in the word of God with others.  

Prayer: Lord we are so excited to store Your word. But we are even more excited to see how quickly it spreads from one end of the earth to the other. Make this become contagious for Your glory! Amen

Midlife Crisis…not really

"Inside the Tent of Meeting, the Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend." Exodus 33:11

Okay I feel like I have hit my midlife crisis at 30! I know that sounds ridiculous, it sounds ridiculous to me as well. To be honest I am not even sure what a midlife crisis is nor am I sure if I even believe there is such a thing. But today I love the saying because I have no other way to express the confusion I feel.

Do this or do that, will I be happy doing this, will I hate doing that? Will this be best for my family or would this be better? These are just a few of the thoughts running through my mind. I am sure it makes no sense whatsoever and I am sure it would help if I was a lot more specific but at the moment I just am not ready to be specific. I am laughing because I don’t think those thoughts would even be considered a midlife crisis, and like I said I don’t even know what a midlife crisis is. I just like it because it makes me laugh.

I can tell you that I love the conversations God and I are having about all of this. Today this was one of them.

Kristi: Lord You made it so clear to Adam, Noah, Abraham, Moses, and Paul what You wanted them to do. I mean seriously You stopped Paul in his tracks and then You spent almost three years with him teaching him one on one. You made it specific to Abraham exactly what he needed to do in order to be the Father of many nations, You even gave him the exact instruction on who to sacrifice and where. Then Noah, wow, Father You were so specific with Noah. You laid out for him exactly what material to use and exactly how to build, design and fill the Ark. And Moses, You came and met with him, talked directly to him, Your presence was so real with Moses he would walk off the mountain and be glowing from Your presence. Can You be that specific with me, I mean You even made it clear to Mary exactly how the conception of Christ would happen and the reason for doing so. There are just so many stories throughout Your word where You have made it so clear to those whom You wanted to use in a specific way. Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John knew exactly what to write because You spoke with power through them. I am not asking to be more than what Your will is for me, I am just asking that You show me what You want me to do and what is best for my family. You know my desire Lord, You created that desire within me, and because of that I know I need to continue to be patient and wait for You to act. Please just help me see the path You are laying out before me and keep me from taking a path I am trying to create on my own.

God: Kristi be still and know that I AM GOD.

So brethren I am going to be still-the best that I can!

Prayer: Lord thank You for meeting with me today. Help me to be still and wait patiently for You to act. Amen

A better kind of rich

“Inside the Tent of Meeting, the Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend.” Exodus 33:11

I came across this passage today and it struck something within me that made me realize the importance of investing in my relationship with the Lord more and investing less in my relationship with the world, and when I say that I mean materialistic things that are of no value.

In Luke 12:21 it says, “Yes, a person is a fool to store up earthly wealth but not have a rich relationship with God.”

God is telling me something here and I don’t want to miss it. In order to better my relationship with Him and become rich, I have to put more into Him. His word needs to become my savings account. I need to deposit into my spiritual bank account and stop depositing into my earthly bank account that is benefiting only me.

I need to be writing checks to those who are need of Christ’s love. I need to become more concerned with how wealthy I am in Christ and not here on earth.

I want to be so rich in my relationship with God that my bank account overflows with His love, joy, peace, mercy, kindness, hope, and complete contentment in what we have together.

Prayer: Lord thank You for Your word and for filling me with the hunger to become rich in my relationship with You. Forgive me for the times I have wanted earthly richness. Amen

Just stay awhile

“Inside the Tent of Meeting, the Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend.” Exodus 33:11

Every time I reflect on this passage, I can’t help but to wonder what these times were like for Moses. I just envision him being so peaceful, so relaxed, happy, but also full of questions, and the urge to look at God and say, “Please let me just stay here with You a little longer.”

I have those moments with the Lord when I never want to leave His presence. In those times I just wish I could  stay forever.

Do you have moments like that with Lord?

Prayer: Jesus thank You for making the time I spend with You so amazing that I never want to leave. Amen

Catching up

“Inside the Tent of Meeting, the Lord would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend.” Exodus 33:11

I am sitting in the lobby of our hotel surrounded by men and women laughing and talking. I am assuming it is a big family reunion. I am tucked away over in a little corner and I can’t help but to watch them as they mingle with family they haven’t seen in a while.

Isn’t it fun to visit family you haven’t seen in a while and catch up on what’s going on? I enjoy it so much; the only bad part about my last couple get together’s has been because of death. But even so, it is still nice to catch up and invest a little more into your relationship.

Just like when we slow down enough to catch up with Jesus and invest some time into our relationship with Him. There is never a time we don’t walk away loving every minute that we spend with Him.

We should really do that more, you know, invest quality time with Jesus like Moses did.  He met with God a lot. We should meet with Jesus a lot.

There is so much joy and laughter in this room, it just feels good, and sounds inviting. That is how I want my relationship with Jesus to be. When we meet I want there to be joy, laughter, and feel and sound so wonderful that I leave wanting to invite others to join us next time.

God is good brethren and I know He is in this room tonight, mingling!

Prayer: Jesus thank You for this huge family. Thank You for bringing them together to catch up and spend quality time with one another in joy and love. I pray that You are the center of each life and that every day they will invest their time in You. Amen